My momma was very liberal with me. She let me grow into my own, letting me make my own mistakes and discoveries with only one guideline. Never control, steal, cheat, lie or manipulate.
I could argue that all of those words boil down to the exact same thing. Taking someone else power away from them because you feel you know what’s best for them. I want to break down the etymology of the word to better understand it. From what I found, by the 1730’s, it was a word used first for digging Ore from the French origin Manipule or “Handful” and later derived into “handling in a skilled way” (Online Etymology Dictionary).
How I see it is that nothing ever starts our dark. Each living essence has the duality of both good and bad within it.
Originally, handling things with care is a beautiful thing. However, it is when you add a personal interest to it that can create handling it with care for the wrong reasons entirely.
Let’s break down “Hand-ful’. From my ‘failed’ experiences, I have found that you cannot hand someone fullness, only they can hand themself fullness. You can show them unconditional love that has zero expectation of anything in return. It is in my belief that only this kind of love can help them understand what it is to be full. To be full is to be selfless. Less self, more whole. We truly ARE all in this together, and it’s literally going to take all of us coming together to change anything around here.
There is a monumental difference between showing someone the tools to regain their power, and telling them what to do and how to get it without giving them the strength within themselves to remind them of the one simple truth that dictates every soul…
Only YOU know what is best for YOU. Period. When you can be free to be you, there is only love for life.
The line between caring and controlling is very thin. We are only ever going to pass down what we know. So it is imperative to ask yourself, what programming has my life seen? What did my surroundings teach me? Are these ideals aligned with the highest good of the world’s health? Do they empower me, of feel like I need someone else for me to be successful in my life? Has anyone I know told me that they know what’s best for me, and not given me the option to follow what feels most right to me?
Right off the bat, in my opinion, it is crucial for us to keep at the forefront of our minds that our souls are coming from all over the galaxy to incarnate here on Earth to learn these triumphant lessons in love and overcoming separation. This makes our purposes and missions very different and sometimes other’s look completely foreign to what makes sense to us.
You may want something for someone else so badly. Like you may simply want them to be happy or to be healthy, independent or to be this or that….but THAT in itself energetically has the complete opposite message to them. By desiring them to be a certain way at all, you are not truly accepting them for who they are and the free will that they have. The underlying vibe you are sending them behind that desire is actually taking their power away! By saying “I just want you to be okay” is energetically telling them that they are not okay, and that they should depend on you to be okay”.
This is stripping them of their sovereignty. Making sure they have to walk with a crutch in life. Taking away the most beautiful thing about them. They’re uniqueness. Just because things worked for you by using a method or tool does not mean that it is the right fit for everyone. One size does NOT fit all here on Earth.
It is so easily overlooked or passed on because it is deep within our societies subconscious programming, but NOW is the time too see these truths for what they are. Some ways to avoid doing this to others is to remind yourself that..
I demand NOTHING from anyone
I accept the peoples decisions, even down to the smallest details
I am accepting over everyones beautiful hue of diversity, and this is what gives this planet such an amazing color palette of potential.
I wish all my fellow traveler well on their journey to self
Always be adding “in my opinion’ or “in my truth’ to your vocabulary to remind yourself and others that you are not claiming to know objective things for FACT. People seek to control their surroundings outside of themselves when they have no internal control for themselves.
Each one of us is endowed with such a magnificently beautiful blue print or map to what it is we can bring to this world. A piece of a much larger puzzle you may say. But we all also have free will and free choice to do what we please, and therefore not everyone may bring the puzzle piece they originally intended to. This world is chalk-full of manipulative distractions to keep you out of our power and out of your truth entirely.
Our internal blueprint is activated and planned out through an energetic system of feelings that currents and cycles through your body. This will show itself to you little by little, always in perfect timing as your life progresses. Your gut feeling, or that internal knowing is subtle at first when you are trying to get in tune with it again, but once you establish the connection, it will become quite obvious and clear to you what the path of least resistance is for your life. This is my scientific reasoning as to why you can’t truly know what’s best for another soul. No matter who you are to them, whether you are their father or mother, brother or sister, significant other or friend. You lack their blueprint. You do have your own blueprint. This is the only thing you are truly responsible for on your journey. Being true to you.
If anyone ever asks you for advice, you might as well start off with reminding them “ Only you know what’s really best for you” to be the best guide you could possibly be. Reminding others of their empowered selves, and that they have all their own answers within them. Of course living by example can help others indirectly as well as long as you are truly doing things for yourself at heart.
Why is this so important? To me, I have had a lot of control put upon me in this lifetime. Many of us have. Thus, I have controlled others not truly knowing that this type of “love” or “caring” is not love at all. It is crippling to any soul. I write this in hopes to shed some light on my darkness. Now that I can see it clearly for what it is, the only thing that feels right to me in this moment is to look at this controlling and manipulative part of myself dead in the eyes, and accept it for what it is. Make amends with it, learn from this, and never repeat it onto another soul again. From here on out, I can choose to live differently with a heightened awareness of this in each moment. I know it’s the right thing for me to do. Coming in vulnerable and open, a bit lost and at square 1 again is a surprisingly nice place to be for me.
Do your best out there,
The Universe through Jordan